For today’s episode, I pulled in a really powerful training done by my Community Manager, Cayla Brooke, in the Female Indie Musician Community. This is so appropriate especially since we are just starting the new year. You may feel that 2020 has failed you and that you should quit. Listen to the techniques she talks about and I will also share some things with you about how I view those techniques in relation to my life and my business.
This is a really important subject that all of us experience at one point — giving up. I want to start with this quote by Michelle A. Homme, “Nothing I ever want to accomplish will become a reality if I always quit.” Sometimes when things become difficult, we just give up because it just gets hard. So we never ever accomplish the dreams we really want. This is applicable in all areas of our lives.
Sometimes we feel so down and we get depressed. But we need to pick ourselves up and not give up. I will share with you some steps that help me to prevent going into a spiral.
1. Take a deep breath. Breath in for 5 seconds. Hold it in for 5 seconds. Then let it out for 5 seconds. Breathing relaxes us. It affects our heart, our digestion, our brain and even our immune system. It clears our head.
2. Get out for a walk and get some exercise. Science proves that walking in nature reduces anxiety, improves our immunity, puts more air in our lungs and helps us relax and focus.
3. Find something to read or listen to a podcast. This opens your Creative Mind.
After Cayla became more calm and relaxed, she thought of the story of Sylvester Stallone.
The Story of Sylvester Stallone is very inspirational. He has this amazing story of how he got to the point that he did the Rocky picture. Basically he was homeless at some point, could barely pay his rent, his marriage has ended and all her had was his dog. He had to sell his dog for $25 because he couldn’t afford to feed him anymore. He cried when he lost his dog. When he wrote the Rocky script, as an unknown writer, he found some producers who were willing to pay him $50,000. He said he wanted to act in it but they declined him and he walked out. Eventually, they offered him $35,000 and allowed him to play the role. When he got the money, he bought his dog back. The person he sold it to did not allow him to take his dog if he would not pay him $15,000 and give him a role in Rocky. This story changed his life and persistence.
Cayla also thought of the story of Colonel Sanders who at 65 years old went from restaurant to restaurant selling his chicken recipe. And the rest is history.
Meditating on these stories helped Cayla realize that if were able to do these, she can also follow her own path. The good thing about meditating on these inspirational stories is that when we see others go through something difficult and make it, we realize that we’re not alone because if they can do it, maybe we can do it too.
After reflecting on those stories, Cayla took the focus off of herself.
4. Take the focus off of yourself.
Do something kind for somebody else. Think about how you can help another person. This will allow you to put a better peace of mind.
While Cayla was walking, she decided that she was going to intentionally love on her husband. As an ego-centric person, that is not the normal thing for her to do but she decided to take the focus off herself. She started to feel much better and out of her slump.
5. Take a forward step towards your goal.
After doing the first steps and feeling much better, you can now take a step towards your goal. Write a blog or a song, or anything that gives value to yourself. Think about what life will not be touched if you give up and do not use your gifts. You do have a gift to give. Do not give up just because you go through hard stuff.
Another thing Cayla wants to point is to quit on a good day. When you do that, you know that you’re making a choice. This does not apply though to a toxic relationship.
For me, getting outside, taking a walk, being in the sun and the fresh air is absolutely tantamount to keeping a positive attitude and not quitting. I’ve come out to some of my best song lyrics on my own walks. I’ve solved so many of my problems because I was able to listen to my own mind and in the silence and not be distracted by other things and really be able to sit with things and not feel that I have to come up with things.
Another thing I love that she said is taking the focus off of yourself. When I was building my indie musician career, there was a lot of ups and downs. What really helped me was at the same time, I was building the Women of Substance platform and I did that because I wanted to elevate other artists. And I did that because I really wanted to help other people and I wasn’t always keeping the focus on myself. Some would ask me if I don’t play my own music on my own radio station. Yes, I do but I am more focused on playing other artists. If you can find something in your career that serves others, that is going to help you so much in your mindset because you know that it’s not just benefiting you but benefiting other people.
We need to always think about why we shouldn’t quit. Things aren’t always easy. I’m so thankful that she gave you these tools to use today. She’s right. The world needs your music so don’t quit.